


But What if I Freeze Up?

by DustySoul



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/F, First Kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-07
Updated: 2015-04-07
Packaged: 2018-03-21 17:46:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3701171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DustySoul/pseuds/DustySoul
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Willow has boys on her mind. Buffy can tell.<br/>She's going to figure out what's got Willow all moppy and fix it however she can.</p>
            </blockquote>





	But What if I Freeze Up?

“Hi will, whatcha worried about now?” Buffy said as she tapped her note book with her pen.

Willow looked up from where she’d been staring off into space. “Hmm?” She made her goofy willow-smile face and leaned back into her chair, “It’s nothing.”

“No really, what is it?” Buffy asked, turning away from her homework all together.

“It’s stupid.”

“Does it have to do with boys?”

“ _Yes_. How’d you know?”

“Lucky guess. So tell me.”

Willow shook her head a fraction.

“Will, come one. Tell me, tell me.”

She smiled again and looked down at her hands.

“We’re besties, you’re contractually obligated to tell about things that have to do with boys.”

“It’s Oz.”

“Of course it’s Oz.” Buffy smiled at the way Willow had gone from guarded and nervous to open and gooey in the space of a name. “What did Oz do?” She propped when it was clear Will has zone out.

“He said he wanted to kiss me.”

Buffy squealed just a little. “Will! That’s fantastic. Did he?”

“Hmm?”

“Did you kiss you, silly.”

“Oh, ah. No. He said that, more than he wanted to kiss me, he wanted me to kiss him back.”

“I don’t follow.”

“Well, it’s just... I've kind of, been all moony for Xander. And Oz doesn't want us being together to be me, oh, I’m really sure. Trying to make Xander jealous I guess. Or settling for him because I can’t have Xander.”

“And?”

“And I don't know! I mean I like Oz and I like Xander. And, if I had kissed Oz it wouldn’t have been  _just_  because of how I can’t be with Xander. It would have mostly been about kissing Oz.” Will threw her pencil in the air. “I mean. I don’t know. I like them both. I can't be with them both. But I can be with Oz.” She trailed off, then whispered, “That should be enough for me.”

“Wow.”

“Wow what? ... What? ... Buffy.”

“This was way more complicated than I would have though.” She exhaled a small laugh.

“More complicated than you’re 200 year old vampire boyfriend?”

“A little bit more complicated, yeah.” Buffy nodded, she moved onto her bed, closer to where Willow was working. “What do you mean, ‘That should be enough for me.’”

“I mean, it’s why Oz didn’t kiss me. Or, well, why I didn’t kiss Oz. And, and it will be enough for me, Buffy. It will. It’s just not. Not right now. I, I want them both. That sounds, that sounds horrible. I’m horrible.”

“No, no, it’s fine.” She reached out to rub Will’s back. “You’re not horrible for wanting who you love. (Whom you love?) Even if that ‘who’ is a little more... plural than most.”

Willow snort. “Whom. And thanks. I just... I know if I was with them both then I wouldn’t have to worry about my feelings for Xander when I’m with Oz. He wouldn’t have to worry about my motives, if I was just showing Xander what he’s missing.” She let out a sigh that shook her frame.

“Yeah.”

“Yeah.”

“And another thing.”

Buffy made a sound of interest.

Willow turned to her, a stricken expression on her face. “I’m really worried that the kissing won’t be so good. That I won’t be so good at kissing. When, if we, ever get around to it.”

Buffy laughed. “That’s not something you need to worry about.”

“Why not? What was your first kissed like?”

“Uh. Hellish, actually. Now that you mention it.”

“ _See_? I- I don’t want to be a _hellish_  kisser. And I am. I probably am. I-I never had the change to-to kiss anyone. I-I must be terrible at it. If-if anyone was a natural kisser it wouldn’t be me.”

“You’re not going to be a bad kisser.”

“How do-do you know? What if, what if Oz kisses me and it just kills it. Destroys or inter relationship because I’m just” she through her hands into the air, “a hellish kisser.”

“That’s not going to happen.”

“You can’t know that. And, and I won’t get any chance to practice. It’s just this moment that we’ve built up in our heads and I’m going to completely ruin it by being a terrible kisser.”

“You’re not. Will. Willow. Willow!” Buffy smiled, “Okay, listen. Maybe you’ll bump noises. Maybe you’ll scrap teeth. Maybe it will be awkward and a little gross. So what. Oz just wants you to kiss him back. That’s easy.”

“What if I freeze up. What if- what if he finally decides it’s-it’s the right time and he goes in for the kiss and I just- I just freeze up.”

“You’re giving me flashbacks.” Buffy joked as she remembered a jock from her old school who’d tasted too salty and didn’t know what to do with his sweaty palms. She sighed, shook her hair over her shoulder and thought. And came up with an idea. And tried to come up with a better idea. No, really, that was a terrible idea.

Willow started to fidget.

“You could...” Buffy started, trying to give herself time to think of a plan that wasn’t so ridiculous. “practice-”

Willow snorted, “Oz would take kindly to that.”

“On me.” Buffy finished.

They stared at each other.

“I mean, it wouldn’t count. If-if it was me. Would it?”

Willow unfurled from how she had her legs drawn up to her chest. “I- no. It wouldn’t count. Doesn’t count. Since we’re...”

“Exactly. So- so I’ll kiss you until you don’t freeze up.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Willow breathed.

Buffy leaned in with fits and starts until her lips just brushed Willow. She scooted a little closer down her bed. Willow hummed and pressed forward.

Buffy pulled back, feeling almost light headed. She tucked the hair that had fallen loose back behind her ears.

“That’s not how a guitarist would kiss.”

Buffy’s chest tightened at the words, “You’re sure of that.”

“Yeah.” Willow whispered, “Do you think that’s how Oz would kiss.”

And Buffy had to agree with that, so she leaned in a second time, smoother, more confident and sucked Willow’s bottom lip into her mouth.

Willow squeaked and jumped.

Buffy pulled back, smiling.

“I- uh. That would have been embarrassing. If- if you were really Oz.”

“Do you want to try again?”

“Yeah, best to, I think.”

Willow moved as little as necessary when Buffy repeated the kiss. Not quite kissing back and not not-kissing-back either. She pulled away about an inch. “Breath, silly.”

Willows laughed scattered against her cheek and Buffy felt like her insides were glowing.

The fourth kiss Willow moved with her, slow. She mirrored Buffy’s actions as soon as she had the chance.

It could have been a few minutes it could have been and hour, but eventually Buffy pulled back and said, “There, now Oz’ll think you’re a natural.”

Willow was smiling. “You think so?”

“Know so.”

**Author's Note:**

> Just a quick thing that quickly spiraled out of control. I didn't mean for it to get this long.
> 
> \--
> 
> Feel free to message or follow me on tumblr at dusty-soul.tumblr.com


End file.
